This week Pastor Jason shared a word for 2024: Identity.
And I couldn’t help but smile, because this is something I’ve wrestled with for years.
I used to be a competitive cross country and track runner all throughout high school and college. If someone were to ask me, “Who are you?” Or “What do you do?” The answer would be “I’m a runner.”
My identity was in running and I saw that as the crux of who I was as a person. And when I landed a college scholarship, I was determined to live up to the identity I had placed on myself.
In order to qualify for the national championship, it was essential to hit a specific time. In the months leading up to one particular 10k race, my coach and I practiced this pace over and over again. I would do 400 meter repeats on the track down to the exact second of the pace so I could memorize what it felt like to run at that speed.
Then the day of the race came. This was my big chance to qualify for the national championships. I knew what my splits (or lap times) needed to be down to the second. As the gun went off, I ran exactly the pace I practiced.
There was one problem…
In our calculations, we made an error. We didn’t account for the extra fraction of a second that would add on to the lap times.
So if I ran a lap in 1:35.3 seconds, that 0.3 at the end would accumulate over the course of the race. I was running 1.35.3, 1:35.8, 1:35.1…and all of those tiny fractions of a second started to add up. Before I knew it, halfway through my race I was 2 minutes behind my goal time.
What happened? I felt like the numbers failed me. Even worse, I felt like I had failed.
All that work, preparation and memorizing the pace began to slip from my hands.
I learned an important lesson that day…you can humanly control just about every variable, but when it comes to the day of the race, it’s all in God’s hands.
It’s kind of like life isn’t it? We try to control and do more and work harder. We try to put in our best effort, but in the end, we realize God might be up to something else. He’s the One running the ship.
Because my identity was in running, it was hard when the Lord stripped that away from me. But sitting here today, I thank Him for it. Without Him peeling those onion layers, I would have never have found what was underneath - my true identity as a daughter of the King.
Nowadays I’m not running 95 second splits on the track…but I am doing something that brings me even deeper joy…I’m talking more to Jesus. I’m a little more dependent on Him, asking Him where we will go next.
In 1 Peter 2:10 God tenderly speaks a new name over us:
“Once you had no identity as a people;
Now you are God’s people.
Once you received no mercy;
Now you have received God’s mercy.”
I don’t know what 2024 will hold for either of us, but I do know that Jesus is on the throne. So somehow, that makes 2024 seem alright. It even makes me feel excited for what is to come…
Whose I am matters more than what I do this year.
The second we start believing that truth, that’s when true heart transformation begins.
And I couldn’t help but smile, because this is something I’ve wrestled with for years.
I used to be a competitive cross country and track runner all throughout high school and college. If someone were to ask me, “Who are you?” Or “What do you do?” The answer would be “I’m a runner.”
My identity was in running and I saw that as the crux of who I was as a person. And when I landed a college scholarship, I was determined to live up to the identity I had placed on myself.
In order to qualify for the national championship, it was essential to hit a specific time. In the months leading up to one particular 10k race, my coach and I practiced this pace over and over again. I would do 400 meter repeats on the track down to the exact second of the pace so I could memorize what it felt like to run at that speed.
Then the day of the race came. This was my big chance to qualify for the national championships. I knew what my splits (or lap times) needed to be down to the second. As the gun went off, I ran exactly the pace I practiced.
There was one problem…
In our calculations, we made an error. We didn’t account for the extra fraction of a second that would add on to the lap times.
So if I ran a lap in 1:35.3 seconds, that 0.3 at the end would accumulate over the course of the race. I was running 1.35.3, 1:35.8, 1:35.1…and all of those tiny fractions of a second started to add up. Before I knew it, halfway through my race I was 2 minutes behind my goal time.
What happened? I felt like the numbers failed me. Even worse, I felt like I had failed.
All that work, preparation and memorizing the pace began to slip from my hands.
I learned an important lesson that day…you can humanly control just about every variable, but when it comes to the day of the race, it’s all in God’s hands.
It’s kind of like life isn’t it? We try to control and do more and work harder. We try to put in our best effort, but in the end, we realize God might be up to something else. He’s the One running the ship.
Because my identity was in running, it was hard when the Lord stripped that away from me. But sitting here today, I thank Him for it. Without Him peeling those onion layers, I would have never have found what was underneath - my true identity as a daughter of the King.
Nowadays I’m not running 95 second splits on the track…but I am doing something that brings me even deeper joy…I’m talking more to Jesus. I’m a little more dependent on Him, asking Him where we will go next.
In 1 Peter 2:10 God tenderly speaks a new name over us:
“Once you had no identity as a people;
Now you are God’s people.
Once you received no mercy;
Now you have received God’s mercy.”
I don’t know what 2024 will hold for either of us, but I do know that Jesus is on the throne. So somehow, that makes 2024 seem alright. It even makes me feel excited for what is to come…
Whose I am matters more than what I do this year.
The second we start believing that truth, that’s when true heart transformation begins.
Erika Pizzo
Erika is the author of the blog erikapizzo.com where she encourages women to care for their mind, body, and spirit as they grow closer to Jesus. She also hosts the podcast “Temple Care” where she provides weekly messages of encouragement. Erika lives with her husband, daughter, son, and their fluffy poodle in sunny Southern California. Her two favorite things are a visit to the beach with a chai latte in hand.